Spiritual Business

Oversharers Anonymous

At the start of each week I am exploring each point on the The Twelve Principles from The Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn.

This week I bring you the seventh point - Make choices: both affirm and set boundaries.

Boundaries protect us. From vinegary friends with their snide asides, overbearing mothers or mother-in-laws and needy staff or coworkers.

i recently had a fascinating conversation with the female head of a major international company who told me about a staff member who constantly shared her stories at work about her hideous childhood. Sad, sure. The right forum? Nope.

She and I pondered over a wine, as to whether the woeful childhood stories were floated before her because she was a woman, ergo, she must be more empathetic. Instead she told me she found herself withdrawing more from this staff member. She felt bad when she realised it but knew it was too late to react any other way. Knowing the whole story of this persons life made her feel too close, the boundaries were crossed and she wanted to retreat like hell!

Who hasn't had that? I have a friend who hates when people who launch into immediate intimacy in a social setting, yet she works in a field where she must elicit secrets from people in order to save them from themselves. These are the boundaries she sets in her personal life. A brief introduction and exchange of names does not give you permission to tell me about your cysts or constipation, she claims, and I agree.

We all have our own set of boundaries, the trick is to not then become uncaring or too distant from those you love and run like hell from the ones who make you feel like shit.

Its not that I don't care, it's just that some things are meant to be shared with certain people and certain people share too much.

Set youself some boundaries and protect yourself and others. Make the choice and if you are unsure if you are an oversharer or not, then head here. If you are on the list, then it's time to rethink your sharing.

0 Responses to ‘Oversharers Anonymous’

Leave a Comment